Konoha's strongest ninj NANI?
by Kamigawa Nagamaki
Summary: there are many twist of fates in fanfiction but this is the most twisted what if naruto Uzumaki was killed when he was 5 and have his life taken by someone else? Chaos everywhere even for kami-sama also humourous
1. trailer

Disclaimer: if you think I own Naruto you're crazier than shukaku

Trailer

8888888888888888888888

The wide gates of Konoha open wide revealing the village and the Hokage monument

88888888888888888888888

A 5 year old Naruto bleeding in an empty alley way on a rainy night

_What have I done wrong?_ Thought Naruto

888888888888888888888

A ninja face covered in darkness stood over Naruto with a kunai.

"DIE DEMON!"

8888888888888888888888888

The screen fades into black then the splattering of blood.

888888888888888888888888888

2 figures surrounded Naruto's body. "do you think he will be okay?" asked the female.

The male figure "Konoha has fallen deeply"

8888888888888888888888888888888

Konoha busy street filled with people moving and talking

8888888888888888888888888888888888

Naruto eyes suddenly burst open revealing crimson slits with a sadist smirk

_FREEDOM!_

88888888888888888888888888888888

Anbu have gathered underneath a tree with corpses hanging skinned and disembowel

888888888888888888888888888888

The hokage looked at the pictures and autopsy of the corpses with disgust

_Who could have done this_ ?

888888888888888888888888888888888888

A lone shadow in the rain sudden unleashed his wrist blades watching as the clouds disperse revealing a crimson moon

_playtime_

8888888888888888888888888888

Lee's chakra is burning red as he release the 3rd gate

Rakan charged at the Nidaime chakra flooding endlessly out from him

Oyuki brushed her hand aside as a hail of kunais rocketed towards her

Ryu looking at a battlefield from his iron sand before crushing the whole thing with his hand

Arashi rushing recklessly towards Kisame and Itachi unfazed by their attacks

Tsuki send one of her chain blades at Minato as they battle for dominates in terms of speed.

Shakaku swallowing Amaterasu and blowing back at the stunned Uchiha

Hashi sitting on the 1st Hokage's head in the Valley of the End face a figure who was sitting on the statue opposite of his. " Nice to meet you again… Madara"

88888888888888888888888888888888888888888888

Darkness fills the screen

88888888888888888888888888888888

Neji looked up helplessly at the at the figure above him. When Nariko turned away Neji asked "Who are you?"

She stopped and partially turned her head then she raise her voice for everyone to hear.

" I am Nariko … Namikaze"

Sry but computer crashed and it took a while to get a new one sryi hope I can undate soon plz review


	2. Revive Revival

Disclaimer: I told you before I don't own Naruto if I did Naruto would be skilled in Genjutsu, and dating Hinata and hachibi as an orochi and use sexy no jutsu more often, I just love a comedy.(when I first saw Naruto it was anime episode 1 initially I thought he ended up like that as a failed henge)

Chapter 1

It was a rainy night in Konoha. The rain kept the residence inside their homes even the ninja's are sleeping under the light drizzle of peace.

Not for one soul however as Naruto is running for dear life as shurikens embedded themselves on his back. Naruto flinched and fell on the muddy road.

Naruto looked back seeing his assailant slowly walking towards him with a sadist smirks. The 5 year old tried to move away but a pair of kunais impales both his knee caps preventing him from escaping Naruto screamed in pain as he slowly drags himself in to an alleyway before realizing it was a dead end.

Naruto can only lie on a nearby wall as the figure revealed itself to be a Konoha jounin.

He looked up at the rainy sky as the rain hid his tears. _What have I done wrong?_ Thought Naruto. He looked up at the jounin as he saw the kunai raised above his head. The ninja yelled "Shine!" (1) and all fell into darkness.

#$^%)((^%^$%#$%%&^*%(*(^*&^%~~!%#^%&*(()_)

The jounin stood there are laughed and quite stupidly as well "Bwabwahahahakeke….. I did it. I killed the demon. HELL YEAH! Bwahaha" He was so into his successful murder that he didn't see 2 people crouching down at the corpse (some jounin).

He even only realizes that they are there when the female figure spoke "Do you think he is okay?"

"Konoha has fallen deeply" said a male voice.

The jounin turned around and yelled "Get away from that demon."

The pair was too busy removing the weapons off the boy's body. To even notice the jounin was there. "We need to have a word to the Hokage about this."

At this the jounin reach to his pouch for a kunai, but before he could reach it 2 serrated blades burst from his chest and his corpse wrenched away disappearing under the down pour.

After the female closed most of the wounds the pair head directly to the Hokage tower as fast as non-ninjas can go.

#$%^&**&%^%#&*)^(*^&$%#^%#!%%&(*^)(&*%^&%^$#

Hiruzen Sarutobi was not having a good time stacks and stacks of paper work continually plague the Professor.

There was a subtle but firm knock on the door which drove Hizuren's attention away from the banes for kages.

"Come in, the door's unlock."

When the door opens he saw an oddly familiar middle aged man with an unfamiliar young woman carrying a very familiar person.

"NARUTO!? What have you done to him?" demanded the Sandaime.

The man scoffed at the old man. "I am Genji Hashi and this is my companion Minamoto Shakaku. We came to Konoha for a place to rest under this downpour and we found this boy slashed and impaled with kunais all over his body and since that only ninjas can use kunais and you're in charge of every shinobi in this village so- WHAT HAVE **YOU** DONE **TO HIM**?!!!"

The sudden outburst took the old man by surprise "What?"

Shakaku then walked forward between the 2 men and said "So, Can we work out a deal?" this left both men shaking in there boots.

#%$^&#$!##&$*&&*(*&^&$*%&(*^$#

Rain quiet pattered down the window where Naruto slept peacefully then slash cause by the kunai cut directly through the seal in his stomach. As red chakra engulf and heal the wound the seal also altered both in form and function.

Naruto's eyes suddenly burst open revealing crimson slits with a sadist smirk. (For those who have trouble imaging this imaging I suggest the last scene in the movie the incredible hulk where Bruce banner mastered his control over hulk-supposedly)

_FREEDOM!_

%#^*%!#$^%$#%^$^&%^

Somewhere in Konoha a lone figure is tying a corpse that is skinned, beheaded, disembowelled and disarmed to a tree in the middle of the rain when a black butterfly fell to its shoulder.

Noticing the butterfly the figure leaped into the air and landed on top of a building.

The butterfly then lands itself on the person's finger and then a voice came out.

_Rakan. target acquired. There are a number of enemies that are a threat. Eliminate them._

Rakan stare at the butterfly as it disintegrated before saying "Mission acknowledge."

He then put his monstrous looking mask on that covers his face except his eyes and mouth.

He then sudden unleashed his wrist blades watching as the clouds disperse revealing a crimson moon

_playtime_

##$$%#^%*&$#!&*($&%^

Shine- not shine but shi-ne which is one of the few ways of writing die in Japanese.

Spoilers: Rakan, Ryu, Oyuki, Hashi, Tsuki, Arashi, Shakaku are actually all codenames of very powerful shinobis

Rakan: Founder of the seven swordsman of the mist

Ryu: an actual character guess who

Oyuki: aperson who created the Yuki-onna myth

Hashi: Actual character guess who

Tsuki: an actual character but wasn't that powerful so I boost her up this story guess who.

Arashi: Founder of the Fuma Clan (not the arashi in the fillers)

Shakaku: A geisha- scary one at that she can produce a sweet face with a demon level ki

Note: Ryu, Tsuki and Hashi are actual characters in Naruto just guess who they really are

Sry I updated very late I have no excuses except laziness, writer's block, and capped internet

I will also be adding more fanfics and hopfully more chapters


	3. Naruto

Thanks to all who reviewed and sry about the delay especially if you had uni from 6am to 8 pm mon-sat you too would drop dead in bed and spend the rest of you time doing homework

Chapter 2 Welcome TO HELL

Hiruzen just stared at the door for several moments, trying to process the events that just happened.

Flashback 10mins

The woman Minamoto Shakaku was staring down at him, well her eyes were shut but held the feeling of a chilling glare with a sweet coat of KI "So, Can we work out a deal?"

Everyone else including the ANBU guards outside are shaking down to their boots (or is it sandals?) and mind you it is in the middle of summer even if it did just finish raining.

Sarutobi was sweating bullets under her gaze as he also was Hashi crouching in the corner "a-a-no What kind of deal?"

"That boy Naruto I heard you say, I want to adopt him." Smiled the woman.

This shocked the Homage "What?"

"You heard me and Hashi will adopt the boy, we will need a home, 104 Hira Street looks empty so we'll take it."

"But…"

"And also we will like to invite some of our friends to come here…"

"Hey Shakaku are you sure that they will listen." Asked Hashi.

"They never refused me before." Smiled Shakaku. "Oh and before I forget I want you to tell me why no-one will help the boy."

Sarutobi just stand rooted in his spot "You're not giving me a say in this are you?" 

Both Hashi and Shakaku replied "No."

The Professor can only sighed in defeat "Agreed."

#$$#^^$!$^#%^

TIMESKIP (Chunnin Exam Stage 3 Preliminaries)

The seven Genin teams stood silent in a large arena, facing a row of older ninja. No one said a word, waiting for the Hokage to speak. There were two railings above them on each side. In front of them stood a pair of fish net clothed shinobi arms, with hands in a Tora hand-seal. Along with Naruto's team, Kabuto's team, Kiba's team, Ino's team, Lee's team, and those three sand ninjas had passed. There were some signs of fear, (namely Kiba) nervousness, along with some joy as everyone observed who had passed, and someone in the group was just bored at the situation.

They stood in the middle of the arena, silent as the grave, as they stared down the senior ninjas. They stood in two rows, with examiners in the front, and instructors in the back. In front stood Iruka, Ibiki, the Third Hokage, Anko, and various other ninja that they couldn't recognize. Behind them stood the instructors, and from the applicant's right to left stood a man with glasses and spiky light-brown hair around his head. Next to him was Asuma, wearing his normal shinobi garb with the usual sash and smoking a cigarette. Kakashi stood next to him, as lazy as ever, with Gai to his side. Kurenai stood beside him, and to her right stood a man with a traditional shinobi vest and spiky hair combed back, spiky at the back of his head. Finally, a man with a small amount of face paint and Sand shinobi clothing stood, with medical tape wrapped around his head, and a piece of cloth covering his left eye.

A stew of thoughts ran through everyone's drowsy minds.

'_I'm famished!'_

_'Sigh, father can you just make the speech and get this over with already?' _This tall bearded guy thought as he resisted smoking his cigarettes.

'_Man, there're still so many left. How troublesome.'_

'_Yay Sasuke-kun pass.' (A/n: honestly can someone tell me how to speak fan-girlish because I can't do it)_

'_Akamaru's acting odd.'_

'_Amazing how only seven of all those teams that started passed. Was it really that hard?'_

'_None of the other sensei's are as good as Gai-sensei! He's the best! I'LL MAKE YOU PROUD!'_

'Wow! Over twenty applicants made it! I said I'd thin them out by half, but I was really expecting something like a single digit!'

'_Naruto-kun? Is that you?'_

'_So, once again you came through without a scratch, Gaara.'_

'_Can we move on with this?'_

'_Mother is shaking, I can't wait'_

"_Hmph." 'I've got a bad feeling about this.'_

'_What happened to Naruto? I don't recall is eyes looking that dead Eh? Sakura 's… oh I see nothing to worry about … I hope ' _Thought a silver haired jounin, his only normal eye narrowed in concern of his students._ 'Fuck, I forgot my Icha Ich...er-wait, never mine, its in my left pocket.'_

'_It's astounding that so many of those applicants survived and passed, but it's even more amazing that the majority of the applicants are young and fresh out of the academy.-'_

Sandaime Sarutobi was now announcing some kind of speech or lecture that made most genin and even some jounin/chunin and one Sanin groan in their minds and had their eyes droop sleepily as if a old boring teacher talking/lecturing among youthful, hyperactive children to death.

"My apologies Hokage-sama..." The man bowed to his village leader breaking boredomof the audience. "...From here on as the referee...Will you please allow me, Gekkou Hayate..."

Sandaime nodded, his eyes still focused on 'Naruto'. "...Yes...By all means..."

Gekkou saluted and turned around making the genin see his face for the first time. "Hello everyone, I'm Hayate and before we commence (cough) the third test there's one thing I'd like you to do" He finished before going to a fit of coughs.

--Genin thoughts about Hayate--

_'This guy look sick, is he alright?'_

_'Ew! He looks as if he caught a cold and gotten better I hope he doesn't comes near me!'_

_'I'm suprised he still standing...'_

_'I don't think he's acting..."_

_'I think he's acting...'_

' _Does he have swine flu?"_

--End of thoughts--

"!!"

"A preliminary?"

"S-Sensei...I dont understand." Questioned Sakura, shocked from this sudden outcome. "Why aren't all the one here allowed to participate in the next text?"

"(Koff)...um...because the first and second test has been too easy this year and for you...However...(koff)...guh...we have a bit too many genins remaining..." Gekkou answered as he kept spewing coughs on every word.

"According to Chunin exam rules, a preliminary must be held to reduce the number of participants for the third test..." The literally sick jounin ignored Sakura's loud "NO WAY!" "...erm, as I was saying...As Hokage-sama indicated earlier, there will be many guest at the third test and if all of you were to pass without reducing you...the fights would take too long, we are limited in time..."

He coughed a bit before focusing on all of the nervous little sprouts. (genin)

"(Koff)...So anyways, anyone who wants out I recommend you do it now since we will be starting the preliminaries...NOW!"

THIS caused Kiba and the others in protest.

"WHAT!? N-NOW!?"

Kabuto looked at one of the smirking jounins and raised his hand catching everyone's attention.

"I quit." He smiled.

Everyone stared at Kabuto as he left the arena.

*BOOM*

With the exception of the Hokage , Team 7, Hinata, Garra, Shikamaru and the senseis of the rookie 9 and the sand trio (no not Baki), everyone got into a guard stance.

A large figure smashed itself through the wall. As the smoke cleared a hulking figure emerge. The Hokage can only sighed as he massage his temples 'You know Rakan was the door never an option for you in the last 8 years?'

Rakan stood 6 foot 8 (just over 2 meters tall) bald, has an eyepatch on his left eye that has a scar running through it as well on every part of him body. His clothing just consist of a hakama that gave of a nasty odour of dried blood which cause many to edge away from him and a katana tied to his obi.

Some of the lesser genins literally gagged at the smell.

Rakan just grinned "Not at all. Besides I heard Orochimaru was in the exams but it seems I lost him."

Hizuren just ignored him and continued to address the group 'let's begin the preliminary rounds. If you'll turn your attention to the screen behind me…"

Everyone turned their gazes to the large screen behind the sickly Jounin, watching as the blackness faded into a dark gray. The letters 'vs.' lit up in the very center. Above them was the name "Uzumaki Naruto" and below it was "Inuzuka Kiba".

Kiba cried "Hell Yeah! We've got an easy win eh Akamaru?" the young pup barked in agreement.

Naruto however was silent "…" and casually walked to the other side of the arena as everybody else went to the balcony._ 'wait,...Naruto...silent?, that can't be right.' _pondered some of those who knew him right now. Others are complicating something different.

Rakan approached Sakura and Sasuke who were unfazed by his smell "Is that Naruto?"

The two only glanced at Naruto before replying "It would seem so."

"What happened at the forest?"

Sasuke pulled his collar a bit revealing the curse seal mark near his neck "Orochimaru said **Gogyō Fūin**." Rakan observed the seal a second more before "Most likely they switched… forcefully."

3%#$^#$^!#~4341143

Kurenai look at to combatants and said to Kakashi "Naruto eh? Sorry Kakashi but your student can't win."

Kakashi still glued to his beloved Icha Icha Paradise (Not to be rude to the fanatic reader but I swear he read it enough time to memorize it with or without the Sharingan) "Really? Then I'm sorry to say that my student there along with his teammates defeated 127 mercenaries within 10 minutes- without a scratch."

All nearby jounins' eyes widen at this remark "NANI?"

Asuna glared "What kind of training did put them through? It's too dangerous for gennins to reach that level."

"How dare you strip them of their innocence like that?" Kurenai was complete restraining herself from attacking Kakashi."

"Yosh! I am also disappointed my eternal rival. I must commend you on the youthful skill of your pupils. But how unyouthful of you to traumatize your pupils like that."

Kakashi blinked.

"Huh? You said something?"

Gai's eyebrow twitched.

'Good reaction, my rival. It's somewhat modern... And it pisses me o...'

SLAP!

Down at the arena

Kiba smirked as he looked at his opponent in front, Naruto's clothes were badly torn and bloody everywhere.

Hayate then yelled "Hajime."

Kiba reached for his pouch and grabbed four shuriken. With animalistic grace he flung every one of them at Naruto with high-pitched speed. His face was shocked as well as the rest when Naruto stood his ground, unafraid that two or three were heading to his throat/heart.

Then Naruto moved his arm as the shuriken lodge themselves into the sloppy defence Naruto made.

Not wasting a single moment Kiba moved on and prepared to attack again.

"**Shikyaku no Jutsu!**" Kiba called, falling to all fours as his nails and teeth grew longer.

Then Kiba shot towards Naruto ramming him with his elbow sending him to the wall. Kiba began laughing at the sheer ease of his opponent. "Examiner, it's over."

Hayate just simply looked and shooked his head and cough again "The match is not over." _Cough cough_

Kiba looked back only to find the spot empty and a large blade by his throat. _How the hck did he get behind me?_

_#$%$543577356735656_

Sasuke looked at Naruto's weapon before replying 'Sakura. _Chire_"

Sakura eyes widened before nodding in response. "Hai, Sasuke-…sama

Rakan raised an eyebrow but said nothing but gave a sadistic smirk.

Kakashi on the other hand ignore the slap Kurenai gave him. "Just for the record my entire team was already 'traumatize' when they became gennins. With a little help they became the perfect ninjas."

Needless to say the Ice Queen exploded louder the Krakatoa and began pounding the cyclops that would make a certain gambler and author grin and flinch respectivly.

Some people edge away as Kakashi as is beaten like an egg in a blender., the sand jounin however said " I hope there won't be too much blood. It will be too troublesome to clean up what come after."

All nearby Konoha nins were thing "Is he related to the Naras?'

$$##$&*(%$#%^$^^!!$$GWRE%$T%%^546545646456q5145g3434

Naruto was about to cut Kiba when Akamaru suddenly attacked him knocking him away from Kiba.

Quickly Kiba flung a Hyōrōgan at Akamaru causing him to turn red. Unfazed Naruto just stood and waited as Kiba and Akamaru began their next attack **Jūjin Bunshin**

A dust cloud covered the pair and emerge with 2 feral Kibas growling at Naruto.

**Gatsuga**

Kiba and Akamaru spun at Naruto who did nothing to protect himself.

At contact Naruto's arms were shredded off and a huge chuck of his right chest was ripped out. Naruto body was lifted up and fell to the ground.

Sasuke, Sakura and Kakashi flinched (Kunernai stopped pounding him after a while.).

Garra and Rakan got interested, everyone else gasped, screamed, panicked (or in Hinata's case fainted.)

Kiba however was shocked at the death he delivered on Naruto.

Hayate coughed then said "Winner-"

"And to think you could be the one to end me." interrupted a muffled voice.

Everyone focused their attention to the voice … it was Naruto's.

Kiba and Akamaru jumped in shock as Naruto got to his feet.

"WHAT THE HELL? ARE YOU IMMORTAL OR SOMETHING?"

Naruto just looked at his body then said "No." Kiba, everyone and even Orochimaru gasped in utmost awe. Naruto's bloody stumps started to grow pure white bones. First the humerus bone, then the ulna bone and with it a radius bone making the forearm. As it was doing so, flesh and muscle started to form as it continued.

Even the chest area was fully regenerate. "I just don't fear death."

Naruto took advantage of Kiba's shock suddenly grabbed his blade which was lying down nearby and split it into a Tri-Blade Fumma Shuriken. He quickly kick one of the Kibas launch him to a wall then threw his shuriken pinning him to the wall Kiba then when poof revealing Akamaru, alive but unconscious.

"Akamaru! Damn you Naruto you monster." At charge very recklessly at Naruto.

Sandaime, Kakashi, and anyone who knows Naruto's history flinched. They know the blond bijuu vessel is very touchy of those negative insults.

Naruto however to advantage at Kiba's rage and burst into a cloud of smoke.

Kiba then stopped preparing for whatever Naruto was planning.

However no-one was prepared for THIS.

Naruto burst out of the smoke in a long haired tanned **Oiroke No Jutsu **with 'meatbuns' the size of melons.

Needless to said that several people were Knock Out by nosebleed.

And Naruto just became to worst enemy to all kunoichi present in the vicinity (with a few exceptions guess who?)

"KAKASHI! WHAT THE F*** DID YOU DO TO THESE KIDS?"(geez there are 12 years olds around you know)

Kiba was rooted at the alluring figure before him, after all he was too young to cover sexual restraint.

Naruto then grabbed Kiba and land his head into a world of heaven.

Kiba struggled as he was suffocating waving his arms as he mindlessly tries to escape from this intimate postion. struggling and struggling only to waste more and more air to breath. And fainted.

Naruto then dropped both Kiba and the Oiroke.

*Cough**cough* "Winner, Naruto." Declared Hayate. As Naruto walked up to the balcony.

"Kakashi what kind of training did put that boy though for him to become like this in so little time" question Gai to his perverted rival.

"Hmm you say something Gai" replied the silver haired perv

Gai just turned away yapping about rival and

* * *

Back to the board The letters 'vs.' lit up in the very center. Above them was the name "Uchiha Sasuke" and below it was "Akado Yoroi".

"So, my opponent is the Uchiha brat."

"Worthless."

* * *

but I have been busy sry I hope I can update sooner. Ja ne plz review I need to know where can I improve.


End file.
